It's just another slice of modern life. It's not a fairy tale to me.

[undealt]

WHO || Mr. Gold vs. the Castle (aka OPEN)
WHAT || there's a guy in your library who has totally always been there. no really.
WHERE || the library
WHEN || like a week before the squiring ceremony.
HOW || either/or. i am flexible if you want more exp points.

The strange thing you might notice is that there's a crocodile curled up outside the library, not really bothering anyone. Just existing. As crocodiles do. Mostly, she's sleeping. Occasionally someone will walk by fairly loudly and she'll lift her crocish head and give generally displeased looks, but otherwise... Crocodile. Sleeping in the hall. Totally normal.

And a member of the Dragon's Fire presently flipping through atlases in the library will tell you as much. His atlas-hoarding is less normal, but he's not really going to comment on it, because he couldn't properly tell you why in the first place. Following leads on his own time, looking up information for missions- who knows. Maybe he liked maps in another life.

Plus they're more interesting than the pile of half-sorted legal documents he's been searching through, checking for loopholes and the like. He might be one of the few people in the damn castle who actually enjoys paperwork (he sort of insisted on taking that project), even if it's half abandoned right now in a fit of whimsy.

Comments

[unhand]

Something about the crocodile puts Hook on edge. He doesn't know what it is besides the fact that it's a bloody crocodile in the hallway, but it bothers him. Enough that he ventures inside the library to tell off whoever brought the blasted creature inside.

He doesn't know why he's certain the man with the atlases is responsible for the crocodile either. Maybe because the man gives him the same not-quite-explicable gut feeling. On instinct, he dislikes the man. Almost as much as he dislikes that great beast.

"Your pet's blocking up the halls."

[undealt]

Gold gives this oncoming nuisance the same amount of attention he gives just about anyone who decides they're going to get huffy at him about something, which is none at all. He's heard it before. In Storybrooke, it was a lot of but I need x piece of collateral despite the fact that I defaulted on my loan. Here, it's... usually something about the crocodile, who for being a recent addition to the castle has caused a bit of a stir.

Most people pick cats for familiars. Maybe a snake or a toad. Mr. Gold does not particular subscribe to cliche. Plus he can think of significantly more uses for a crocodile in a mission situation than a cat.

Or maybe he's just so used to having something about him being a thorn in the side of whatever society he finds himself in, it was necessary to maintain status quo. Either way, he's heard it before.

"Familiar is the term." He finally looks up from the atlas he's been studying with a sort of half-condescending look. Familiar is the term, indeed. He can't quite deny there's a bit more than the usual disdain for most people twisting about in his gut looking at this man- much like his interest in maps, there's no real explanation. "Don't mind her. Just go around. You'll hardly notice she's there."

[unhand]

"Hardly notice? You do realize how big it is, right?" Pet, familiar, it's all the same to Killian. The thing is still in his way and there's something extremely disturbing in its eyes. "How about instead, you leave it in the ocean where it belongs."

[undealt]

"Don't tell me it's the 'crocodile took my hand' story?" Yeah. He totally noticed. It's the fact that there are weirder things in this castle than one-handed pseudo-Irishman that doesn't give it much cause for alarm.

That and Gold has a very tiny basket for his fucks and he emptied it this morning. "It's a bit unoriginal, isn't it?"

[unhand]

Actually, Hook didn't remember how he lost his hand. It was part of the big, gaping hole in his memory that wouldn't fill in, try as he might to remember. He was pretty sure it had been cut off, though.

"Don't believe everything you read about me. The stories tend to embellish."

[undealt]

He paused, because up until this moment, he just thought some asshole lost his hand and thought it would be really cool to attach a hook onto it and cosplay Captain Hook. Now he was doubting that.

And he was still going to be a bastard about it. "Either way, you'll be happy to know the Knights don't employ free-spirited teenage boys." He came around from behind the table, so he could properly judge Killian's life. "And, incidentally, the crocodile has already earned her keep. Can you the say the same for yourself, Captain?"

[unhand]

It had been a long time since Hook had been a free-spirited teenage boy because shut up I will put my headcanon in here if I want it hasn't been retconned yet so that doesn't bother him or make him particularly happy. It was probably a reference to his tale he didn't get. There did seem to be so many misinterpretations.

"Indeed I can. And it wasn't by reading or having too many teeth, either."

[undealt]

Gold laughed in that sort of haughty, wow-I'm-so-much-smarter-than-you-peasant way. "I wouldn't say reading's my only talent, and Milah's not the only one with a bit of bite between us."

Magic: Apparently still power in alternate worlds. Just like his sass never went away with the lion's share of his memories.

[unhand]

Hook was about to whip out his dick to get it over with and compare length, but that stopped him up short. "Your crocodile's named Milah?" It couldn't be that common a name...

[undealt]

Yeah, that would have been a bad move all around, okay. Gar could have walked in and then you'd be sorry.

Gold raised his eyebrows. No, it wasn't a common name. In fact, it was one most assumed he'd just made up and he'd claim that it drifted into his subconscious rather unexpectedly upon meeting his familiar. "That depends," he said, slowly. "Does it mean something to you?"

[unhand]

"No." It was the truth. The name meant nothing to him. But that didn't make it any less tattooed on his arm.

[undealt]

"Ah." Never let it be said that even mostly disassociated from his previous life that names and the importance of them ever elude Gold. The name may not have meant anything at all to either of them, specifically, but...

"But it does mean something, doesn't it?"

[unhand]

It had to mean something. He wouldn't have tattooed it on his arm if it didn't. But he want to admit it.

"You tell me. It's your crocodile."

[undealt]

Well, he couldn't argue with that, but he shrugged, nonetheless, like it wasn't that big of a deal. (It was- it was something previously thought to be a fragment from a barely remembered dream, but now it seemed terribly important somehow.) "It just came to me one day. In Greek, it means 'pleasant," so I suppose I was just attached to the irony."

[unhand]

"Because that thing is the opposite of pleasant?" Or because the man was? Hook had disliked both since they came into his field of vision.

[undealt]

"Only if you give her an excuse to dislike you." Like making a scene at her master or waving a hook in her face or something of that nature. "I trust you won't be provoking her. I don't fancy having to explain to Wynn how you lost the other hand."

[unhand]

Hook stepped in closer, raising his hook not quite to neck level. "Is that a threat?"

[undealt]

♪ a wild song cue appears.

Certain other people who don't exist because amnesia happened to be terrible would have probably reacted quite irrationally to that. Luckily, Gold had the sense (and no bitter history) to not go completely apeshit and clock a man with his cane for waving a hook at him.

...He totally wanted to though. It would be cathartic, but alas, he wasn't in the mood for a lecture about why concussions were bad for morale. "Just simple fact, really," he drawled, trying for nonchalant and failing miserably. Nonchalant was difficult to manage when you grit your teeth like that. "Don't stick your hand near the crocodile's mouth and you won't lose it."

Okay, that one... was actually a threat.

best song cue

[unhand]

"Less you remove all its teeth first." Hook stepped in uncomfortably close. He didn't like being threatened, especially not by this man. He didn't know what it was that made him so on edge, but it didn't even matter at this point. He didn't like being threatened by anyone. He wasn't going to show any fear. "Tell me, should I start plucking?"

[undealt]

Hope you're really proud of that extra three inches, Hook.

Okay. Now it was getting personal. Gold narrowed his eyes, but tried to play it off like he wasn't deeply annoyed by this turn of events. "You're not going to make a scene now, are you?"

Last warning, bro.

[unhand]

His penis sure is.

"Not unless you do." Which was to say, he had no reason to be openly hostile to Gold. He only wanted a reason. Wanted to slash his hook across the smug looking face and feed the man to his own crocodile. But there was no bloody reason.

[undealt]

And to make this moment even more gay, Gold looked Hook up and down, as if debating the merits of trouncing him up and down every aisle of this library in a completely non-sexy way, which wasn't really gay at all, but tell slash fangirls that. Upon accepting that Hook just wasn't worth it, he sneered, "Not interested."

Given that Hook wasn't going to stop invading his personal bubble, Gold removed himself from said bubble. "Carry on, Captain," he added, just to give a little bit of finality to this conversation. It hadn't shaken him- he didn't get shaken, especially not by vague notions that he ought to be remembering something or feelings that tapped into something primal he couldn't quite control.

It was nothing and this captain was nothing to him. That was all.

[unhand]

Hook scoffed and turned back towards the door. He had no interest in lurking around a library if he didn't get to fight someone. "Coward," he muttered, just loud enough to be heard. Not that it was necessarily cowardly backing down from a fight that didn't need to happen. Hook didn't really care about that, though. He just cared about insulting the wanker.

1/2

[undealt]

2/2

[undealt]

Actually, while the urge to hobble across the room and strangle Hook with his cane or maybe shove a bookshelf on the top of him was great, he had absolutely no context for why being called a coward would get under his skin and that alone was enough to stay his hand. This lack of memories bit was going to get terribly old, terribly fast, especially when it tapdanced all over his exceedingly hairtrigger temper.

But he let the man walk, glaring daggers at him all the way over his shoulder. He'd find a way to pay back the insult eventually. He didn't usually let people get away, after all.