[ the pointed stare pierces into her like a spear and sticks her to her seat. she wants to get up, wants to flee the room before it becomes all too apparent how isabella's words are cutting her up inside, but she can't budge. all she can do is stare right back into the italian woman's eyes, expression contorting as she tries harder and harder to cover the damage she's leaving.
but tears well up behind her eyes and they take on a glossy appearance. she raises her chin, blinking quickly, turning away and swallowing hard to try and get rid of the lump in her throat, to try and compose herself again, but she can't.
he'd used her.
not just to get to jade. not just the concert, which had felt miserable enough to realize. he'd used her because she reminded him of the only woman he really did care about. she'd never meant anything to him at all. she'd been a shade, someone that rafael could simply surround himself so he could watch the shadows of his former life dance off the walls.
she might as well have been a piece of furniture.
it's impossible to stop the tears entirely, and as she blinks most of them back, a few trickle quickly down. she ducks her head to try and disguise it as she reaches up to rub them away hastily, though it's obvious what she's doing (will save 10, hide 7).
the worst part of all of this is that none of it changes a damned thing, because she still feels that pull in her heart, that iron-tight grip that he has on it making her buckle. she still can't imagine actually allowing this to continue, for the american police to extradite him back to italy for trial for any of this. she still feels that connection to him that she'd always felt, that had grown stronger in november, and proven to be a point of no return.
des' grip brings her back to reality, and she straightens quickly. she clears her throat, glancing around at the others and pretending there isn't a telling red puffiness to her eyes. she doesn't address des' threats, because honestly she can't bring herself to talk him down from the violence he keeps promising rafael, buts he also can't guarantee she'd rough him into assisting herself.
she's always thought of herself as their weapon, but not against him. so with a cracking voice, she moves onto what's really important here; ]
no subject
but tears well up behind her eyes and they take on a glossy appearance. she raises her chin, blinking quickly, turning away and swallowing hard to try and get rid of the lump in her throat, to try and compose herself again, but she can't.
he'd used her.
not just to get to jade. not just the concert, which had felt miserable enough to realize. he'd used her because she reminded him of the only woman he really did care about. she'd never meant anything to him at all. she'd been a shade, someone that rafael could simply surround himself so he could watch the shadows of his former life dance off the walls.
she might as well have been a piece of furniture.
it's impossible to stop the tears entirely, and as she blinks most of them back, a few trickle quickly down. she ducks her head to try and disguise it as she reaches up to rub them away hastily, though it's obvious what she's doing (will save 10, hide 7).
the worst part of all of this is that none of it changes a damned thing, because she still feels that pull in her heart, that iron-tight grip that he has on it making her buckle. she still can't imagine actually allowing this to continue, for the american police to extradite him back to italy for trial for any of this. she still feels that connection to him that she'd always felt, that had grown stronger in november, and proven to be a point of no return.
des' grip brings her back to reality, and she straightens quickly. she clears her throat, glancing around at the others and pretending there isn't a telling red puffiness to her eyes. she doesn't address des' threats, because honestly she can't bring herself to talk him down from the violence he keeps promising rafael, buts he also can't guarantee she'd rough him into assisting herself.
she's always thought of herself as their weapon, but not against him. so with a cracking voice, she moves onto what's really important here; ]
One step at a time. How do we get him out?