[As soon as he's finished with Burt, Des stalks up to the podium, carrying his hat with him. He lays it on the podium and produces five pages of wrinkled printed sheets and tries to smooth them out in front of him. For a second or two he just stares at them, unsure of where to begin, even though he literally has the words in front of him. And then he ducks his head, huffs a sigh, and looks out at the assembled group.]
I had a guy write me this big speech- something suitable for an elvish funeral. Something impersonal that wasn't gonna choke me up or rip my heart out and show it to everyone. And then I realized that the that Jade liked about me was that I was real and I was honest and by getting someone who didn't know her to make up some shit about her, I was doing the thing that was killing her before she died. Pretending. The fact is- Jade loved me because I was real. So screw it.
[He pulls a lighter out of his pocket and sets the pages on fire, holding them while they burn.] I didn't know her that long. I knew what some would say was a shadow- a girl missing a chunk of herself, shaped from years of loving a man who definitely wasn't me. But that's not true. Those memories weren't all there was to Jade. She was broken, but she wasn't defective. She wasn't empty.
[The fire reaches his fingertips and he shakes his hand, letting ash scatter across the floor in front of him. It's a nice distraction, while he composes himself. (will save 20 total)]
I'm not the kind of guy who's really thrilled to wake up every morning. When I was with her... I didn't think every day I was still breathing was such a curse. No one's ever had that effect on me before. Not like that. She had something. Something that lost memories or whatever the hell she suffered from couldn't take from her. She had life.
[He pauses, turning to look at the body in the coffin before tearing his eyes away and gripping the podium to finish, through gritted teeth.]
And, for a little while, she made me appreciate mine. [He barely manages to keep from crying when he steps away from the podium and back to his seat (will save 13).]
no subject
[As soon as he's finished with Burt, Des stalks up to the podium, carrying his hat with him. He lays it on the podium and produces five pages of wrinkled printed sheets and tries to smooth them out in front of him. For a second or two he just stares at them, unsure of where to begin, even though he literally has the words in front of him. And then he ducks his head, huffs a sigh, and looks out at the assembled group.]
I had a guy write me this big speech- something suitable for an elvish funeral. Something impersonal that wasn't gonna choke me up or rip my heart out and show it to everyone. And then I realized that the that Jade liked about me was that I was real and I was honest and by getting someone who didn't know her to make up some shit about her, I was doing the thing that was killing her before she died. Pretending. The fact is- Jade loved me because I was real. So screw it.
[He pulls a lighter out of his pocket and sets the pages on fire, holding them while they burn.] I didn't know her that long. I knew what some would say was a shadow- a girl missing a chunk of herself, shaped from years of loving a man who definitely wasn't me. But that's not true. Those memories weren't all there was to Jade. She was broken, but she wasn't defective. She wasn't empty.
[The fire reaches his fingertips and he shakes his hand, letting ash scatter across the floor in front of him. It's a nice distraction, while he composes himself. (will save 20 total)]
I'm not the kind of guy who's really thrilled to wake up every morning. When I was with her... I didn't think every day I was still breathing was such a curse. No one's ever had that effect on me before. Not like that. She had something. Something that lost memories or whatever the hell she suffered from couldn't take from her. She had life.
[He pauses, turning to look at the body in the coffin before tearing his eyes away and gripping the podium to finish, through gritted teeth.]
And, for a little while, she made me appreciate mine. [He barely manages to keep from crying when he steps away from the podium and back to his seat (will save 13).]