chicago ♔ something wrong | with all the plans of my life

[rationalizes]

♬ Killing Loneliness - HIM

WHO || Failboat + Burt [Closed]
WHAT || Various and sundry post-funeral shenanigans
WHERE || Chicago, IL
WHEN || July 6, evening.
HOW || Actionspam

[ This log will cover all events that take place between the funeral and the NOVA Record break-in two nights later, that weren't hit on during the live session. Feel free to make your own threads! ]

Comments

[nothingsodivine]

[......]

That'd be great if I was drivin' beer from Texarcana to Atlanta. What the hell d'you think I do on my off-hours? Drag race?

[isisagent]

... Do you not? Because, you could. This baby tops out at like 180.

[nothingsodivine]

I don't even get into car chases when I can help it. [THE LAST TIME HE WAS IN ONE, HE ALMOST HAD A PANIC ATTACK.

But he does need a car. He looks at the El Camino and lets his shoulders slump.] For the time being, I will keep it. If only because it'll be weeks before I can get my insurance sorted out enough to replace the 'vette. After that, you can do whatever you want with it.

[isisagent]

[Archer grins.]

Chases aren't a problem with this mean bitch anyway. She's got oil slicks, and tire tacks, ejector seat - all the necessary tools. And, of course, a minibar.

[nothingsodivine]

[THERE ARE NOT ENOUGH ELLIPSES IN THE WORLD FOR THIS.]

You're fucking with me, right?

[isisagent]

OH! I almost forgot, it's got on-board GPS, and a voice-activated computer... What else... I just kept throwing money at those guys - it's got a like demo mode, though, start it up.

[nothingsodivine]

[OKAY, YOU KNOW WHAT... He just waves his hands.] I'm just gonna stop you right there. Seriously. There is a point where too much is too much, Jimmy Bond.

[isisagent]

No, you're right, I should stop.

My penis can only get so erect, right? heh... and I'm supposed to be breaking into some building soonish... need to change into a tactle-neck, and get some booze in my system.

[He claps Des on the other shoulder - leaving a matching black stain.]
Enjoy the car!

[nothingsodivine]

[AS SOON AS ARCHER IS OFF AND AWAY...

Des mimes strangling hands.

And then he stares at the car, checks to make sure Archer's really and truly gone, and then leans over to put the key in the ignition and start it...]

[isisagent]

[As the engine fires up, the on-board computer springs to life. Archer's face is on the LCD screen.]
[Archer's voice fills the cabin - but it has a robotic quality to it, and speaks differently than he would.]

Welcome to your "bad ass" new ride, Desmond. First time drivers should note that the glass and exterior panels are bullet-proof, the tires are run-flats, just in case.

You are capable of ejecting yourself or passengers from the vehicle, or emitting oil and tacks via controls at the center console. Also, you can spin up the twin 30-calibre machine guns in the front. Top speed is 185 miles per hour, and the glove compartment has a well stocked mini-bar.

[A drink slides itself out at this mention, and a map pops up on the screen.]

Where to, Desmond?

[nothingsodivine]

[Des shuts off the car IMMEDIATELY.]

I'm gonna bust his kneecaps. I swear to God.

[graveflowers]

[Basically... eff your solitude, Des. Because here comes Violet. Look, she is stuck in the hotel -- if the sidewalk is as far as she can escape then she is going to take it. Which might explain why she sort of, possibly, gives that tree on the sidewalk a little high five.

And then turns to see Des.] Oh. [Sorry if that isn't the most effusive greeting.] Hey old man.

[nothingsodivine]

[No depression in the world can hide the wtf look that crosses Des's face.] Did you really just high five that tree?

[graveflowers]

[She's useful like that.] Flower power.

[nothingsodivine]

Uh-huh. I heard your tree really saved the day tonight.

[Actually he did not hear that at all, but he figures if the bad guys resorted to GIANT FUCKING WORMS, then it must have put some sort of damper on things. And maybe he actually wants her to feel better about being left.]

[graveflowers]

[Intended effect not happening at all, helplessness is a pit of despair that takes a while to crawl out of.] Good for Jade's tree. Imagine what if could have done if I wasn't stuck here with Elf and Elf Lite.

[nothingsodivine]

You could've seen Kat crash my car into a semi in real time. [MUTTER GRUMBLE. STILL BITTER.]

[graveflowers]

[Not even caring what the story is behind that is probably a bad thing.] Sorry. [She doesn't sound it!]

[nothingsodivine]

[He runs his hands through his hair and puffs out his cheeks in a frustrated huff. Not hearing a million people cooing in his ear about how it'll be okay and he'll get a new car is worst than someone who doesn't even care.] Sorry you had to stay home.

[So yeah. There's that.]

[graveflowers]

Thanks. And next time do you think you could refrain from mentioning about how Keijen could mind whammy me into doing probably inappropriate things in front of my boyfriend? [JUST A THOUGHT, DES.]

[nothingsodivine]

[......]

How the hell was I supposed to know you were dating someone? I'm immortal, not a freakin' mind-reader.

[BOMBED ANOTHER WISDOM CHECK. A+ DES]

[graveflowers]

The holding hands and hugging thing didn't... [She stops, sighs. That was pretty much all she was annoyed at him about so now the wind is out of her sails.] Nevermind, it doesn't matter.

[She scratches at her tattoo in annoyance.] Now you know. I already have one guy clipping my wings. It'd be swell having someone on my side.

[nothingsodivine]

I don't- [He rubs his neck.] Yeah, forget it.

[A sigh.] Look, Buttercup... You wanna take a walk? There's something I forgot to tell you before all hell broke loose.

[graveflowers]

Yeah, sure. [A beat.] Sorry about your car.

[nothingsodivine]

[He huffs again and starts walking, hands buried into the pockets of his leather jacket. When he speaks, he speaks in hushed tones.] I think I know why that necklace gave you a direct link to Blade's god buddy.