holding his eyes the way that she is, it's impossible to miss the tiny shift of recognition there, something clicking into place with the words and gesture.
she's told him point blank that she loves him before, and he's said the words back with simple confidence, but the fine razor edge between one kind of love and another has always obscured the meaning of that particular confession, and also his understanding of it. it's hard to say which was more or less painful - if he'd meant he knew she loved him romantically, and felt the same, but still wouldn't press things forward for one reason or another, or if he honestly saw their friendship as strong enough to toss the phrase around without having romance even figure into it. or maybe it wasn't either - maybe he didn't feel the same, or maybe --
well, with them, there was never any shortage of maybes.
for a moment now, however, the maybes seem to disappear. there's very little room for ambiguity in her statement, even from the rafael giovanni school of wisdom checks. his mouth opens very slightly as if words are looking to pour out, but vanish the second they hit his lips. there's a softness to his gaze, but also a small degree of sympathy, of doubt, fear even. but none of those things completely dilute the fondness either, the understanding of what she's saying and an acknowledgement of the pain lying at the heart of her dramatic confession.
he seems to get it. on a profound shared level, he gets why this is killing both of them right now. but getting it doesn't change the reality of what this is, either. what circumstances have brought them to.
a good-bye. ]
Carina... [ the word seems a little breathless, and also, quite simply, miserable. there's a weight of impossibility in the air, a sense that this moment serves as a representation of all they have to look forward to if their hearts stay on this track - duty or destiny pushing them in opposite directions. his fingers curve against her arm, as if gripping it a little more tightly could possibly change that, could give him the time he might actually need to ground himself here.
but that's it. that's all he can say. that's all you get. ]
no subject
holding his eyes the way that she is, it's impossible to miss the tiny shift of recognition there, something clicking into place with the words and gesture.
she's told him point blank that she loves him before, and he's said the words back with simple confidence, but the fine razor edge between one kind of love and another has always obscured the meaning of that particular confession, and also his understanding of it. it's hard to say which was more or less painful - if he'd meant he knew she loved him romantically, and felt the same, but still wouldn't press things forward for one reason or another, or if he honestly saw their friendship as strong enough to toss the phrase around without having romance even figure into it. or maybe it wasn't either - maybe he didn't feel the same, or maybe --
well, with them, there was never any shortage of maybes.
for a moment now, however, the maybes seem to disappear. there's very little room for ambiguity in her statement, even from the rafael giovanni school of wisdom checks. his mouth opens very slightly as if words are looking to pour out, but vanish the second they hit his lips. there's a softness to his gaze, but also a small degree of sympathy, of doubt, fear even. but none of those things completely dilute the fondness either, the understanding of what she's saying and an acknowledgement of the pain lying at the heart of her dramatic confession.
he seems to get it. on a profound shared level, he gets why this is killing both of them right now. but getting it doesn't change the reality of what this is, either. what circumstances have brought them to.
a good-bye. ]
Carina... [ the word seems a little breathless, and also, quite simply, miserable. there's a weight of impossibility in the air, a sense that this moment serves as a representation of all they have to look forward to if their hearts stay on this track - duty or destiny pushing them in opposite directions. his fingers curve against her arm, as if gripping it a little more tightly could possibly change that, could give him the time he might actually need to ground himself here.
but that's it. that's all he can say. that's all you get. ]