new orleans ♔ we're only liars but we're the best

[starfucker]

♬ Our Lawyer Made Us Change the Name of this Song So We Wouldn't Get Sued - Fallout Boy

WHO || Burt, Martha, Des, Finnick, Mark, Spike, Arthur [closed]
WHAT || While Finnick continues his celebrity charade, the other Knights have the chance to sneak around and try to find out more information about the mysterious Chad Becksworth's activities...
WHERE || NOVA Records HQ, New Orleans, LA
WHEN || Tuesday, July 3rd, 2012; any time of day
HOW || Actionspam

[ It took a few weeks to process Finnick's fake background paperwork and get his contract with NOVA in order. In the meantime, Burt's been keeping in close touch with Finnick and Des, arranging for different talent coaches to work with their new star on singing, dancing, and all that other crap. He's sent plenty of songs home with Finnick to start learning, and now that everything's processed, he's arranged for him to come to the studio, where he'll be reporting daily to work.

Of course, this gives the Knights the ideal in, as what celebrity doesn't need an entourage? Mark even bought everyone outrageous entourage clothing to wear. 8) You like it. ]

Comments

[65]

["just let the nice men do whatever the hell they want to you." WOW THAT'S NOT ONE HE'S HEARD BEFORE AT ALL ... ]

How long do you think this is going to take?

[starfucker]

[ at least it probably won't involve lube, finnick. ]

Let's aim for 'all morning' because after lunch, you've got a date with a choreographer.

[65]

[yeah that's ... one thing to be thankful for. .o. ]

[with nonchalance] I can't wait for lunch, I'm already starving.

[starfucker]

[ Burt immediately spins on his heels and snaps his fingers, gesturing at some attendant towards the door. ] Are you deaf and useless? Man wants some eats. Pronto! Sweet mother Mary's gaping cunt, doesn't anybody work around here?

[65]

Ice cream would be good. [nope he is not worried about wrecking his sexy body at all.]

[starfucker]

That can be arranged. [ he plants a hand on either of finnick's shoulders, steering him gently towards a chair on a raised platform in front of some mirrors. about three stylists come forward all at the same time, hands laden with scissors and gel and other supplies. ]

Now let's get this party started. I'm a busy man.

[65]

[he takes the chair and lets himself get preened over. as much ~fun~ as it is, it reminds him of his hunger games adventures -- at least it's in more of an annoyed way than a ptsd way.]

[starfucker]

[ meanwhile his gigantic fucking ice cream cart arrives, with a host of flavors to choose from. burt rambles in the meantime. ]

So I'm planning on marketing you to the tween/lonely twenty something club slut crowd, at this point. With a certain douchebag chip on the shoulder that'll make sure men don't dismiss you as some kind of pansy ass.

[aproperdoctor]

[Martha's just going to put down the issue of Cosmo she's been flipping through to meander over to the ice cream cart. She makes sure to stay out of everybody's way while she makes a chocolate chocolate sundae monstrosity.

(Okay, she's a tiny girl, it's probably not that much of a monstrosity. DON'T START WITH ANY FAT CRACKS, BURT.)]

[65]

Impressive. [he raises his eyebrows at martha's life choices before going back to examining the list of flavors and listening to burt.]

I can hardly wait. [he has really mastered the art of sounding bored-because-i-am-better-than-everyone-else-in-the-room.] How do you plan on getting that to come across?

[starfucker]

[ one of the stylists moseys over to martha at the cart, and just picks up a lock of her hair skeptically. "Oh honey," he says and shakes his head, tsking.

Meanwhile, Burt talks animatedly to Finnick as he's fussed over. ]

Lesson number one, kid: talent does not a celebrity make. Drama does. In fact, if people know who you are before they even hear you sing, they won't care what you sound like. We just pay the right mags to start printing stories about you as if people should already care, and they will because we told them to.

We'll just start trotting you out to celebrity parties, arranging for some public scenes, that kind of thing. Maybe we'll start linking your name to some celebrity hotties. Any preferences?

[aproperdoctor]

[Martha looks somewhat affronted by the stylist's tone of voice, but that doesn't mean that she isn't going to let him have his way with her hair. And her makeup. And whatever the hell else he feels like not like that.]

Definitely not one of the Kardashians. [Martha wonders for a moment if the Kardashians aren't some sort of Shadowkind, but decides against voicing this opinion.] I mean, I reckon it'd create loads of drama and get him noticed, but it's just trashy at this point. Like, extra-trashy.

[starfucker]

I was thinking of staying off the reality TV circuit. Shit is a trainwreck when you're trying to light a fire under the ass of anybody's career.

[65]

[he does not even know what they're talking about right now. wtf.]

Yeah, I'd rather stay away from that.

[starfucker]

[ it's ironic b/c finnick is a reality tv star, see. ]

Too bad Miley Cyrus is marrying Thor's brother. I'll work on figuring out who's single or could be single or who could be stepping out on their significant other if they're far from single.

[65]

[if he only knew :'( ]

Wait, what? Is pairing me up with someone part of the plan?

[aw here it goes.]

[starfucker]

Not with any kind of permanency, kid, don't sweat it. But dropping your name next to a big star's can go a long way.

[65]

[why does he even bother trying to be surprised. whatever, this isn't his first rodeo. he shrugs.]

Whatever you think will help. [he finally settles on some ice cream and gets to stuffing his face with it.]

[starfucker]

Alright, whatever you do to him, let's stay away from a Bieber haircut.

[65]

[WHO THE FUCK IS BEIBER finnick thinks to himself while sitting around getting his hurr did ... ]

[aproperdoctor]

At least he won't look as much like a girl as Justin Bieber does, hair or no.

[Martha makes the most helpful comments. But at least she's gettin' her hairs did.]

[starfucker]

[ Annnnd they do a 32 disguise check styling job on Finnick B) So he comes out looking like a new man. Or justin timberlake. idk.

meanwhile they just get a 26 on martha which sounds a lot less but is still banging hot. hot enough that burt leans over next to her at one point. ] When did you get her, gorgeous?

[ yes, he's an asshole. ]