debriefing ♔ in the emptiness there's a solution | just look within yourself for absolution

[nepotism]

♬ locking up the sun- poets of the fall

WHO || Wynn, Buffy, Myri, Finnick, Spike, Gar, Archer, Des, Vi, Rafael, Fred Jr., Dumage, Mark, Rocket, open! [Closed]
WHAT || Andres Mission Debrief & Aftermath
WHERE || Knights HQ, lobby etc.
WHEN || September 18th [forward dated*]
HOW || Actionspam. Single thread, don't worry about maintaining tagging order.

There are plenty of missions that return to the castle a success - most of them, even. The defeated air of the solemn group that returns from their diplomatic mission to Andres Isle to hear the demands of dictator Dimitris Sarandis makes it quite clear that this wasn't one of those.

Starting with Sarandis' actual demands - for all Knights to withdraw from Andres under penalty of death, or for Wynn to offer his own head in return for Thomas' safe return - and ending with the unexpected, disturbing confession from Kat that she intended to stay behind on the island because she had "fallen in love with" the dictator, the events of the island made it very clear that Sarandis was cannily playing his hand to get the Knights where he wanted them.

Fred Jr. shoves open the doors with his unnatural strength, stalking in ahead of the group into the lobby. Whoever's on desk duty isn't going to have to roll a high wisdom check to see that these people are pissed... and distraught... and a myriad of other emotions on the bad end of the scale.

*I am changing the date of the briefing log and Andres log/live session to have taken place in September, to avoid us being in backdated hell forever, and to allow for a September squiring ceremony before apps are closed. Carry on... in the future!

Comments

[beatupgrass]

[Resigned sighing to hide the fact that it's kinda nice??? Who doesn't love ear scritches!! No, but he's totally a proud sapient being and after an acceptable amount of time has passed, he flails a hand. Like a cat that wants you to STOP TOUCHING IT BECAUSE IT'S DONE WITH YOUR TOUCHING, PEASANT.] Do I look like some dippy blonde broad to you? [He got a fucking 22 on that pop culture check. Apparently, Andres is just really into pop music. I would consider Fancy on a loop to be torture too, Rocket. It's okay.]

I'm a bounty hunter. [And a Guardian of the Galaxy, but hahahaha they don't cover the galaxy beyond the Veil, okay.]

[pathology]

[OH FINE. she pulls her hand back. you're a poop, rocket.] Cool! I used to be a master thief assistant but now I'm mostly a medic.

[beatupgrass]

[WOW ASTRID. WOULD YOU BE OKAY WITH SOME STRANGE PERSON PETTING YOUR HEAD FOR AN INDETERMINATE AMOUNT OF TI- maybe. We just don't know.]

Master thief assistant. [Look at that skeptical face.] Didn't they use to call that a sidekick.

[Yeah, there's no judgment from the BOUNTY HUNTING RACCOON. Just wow girl. Call it what it is.]

[pathology]

[um. she's a ginger. people ask her if they can touch her hair all the time. she knows. which you would think would make her more sensitive to his plight, but LOL no.]

Shut up, fuzzball. What are you looking for in the light wing? Maybe I can help. Because the last thing I want before I go out for oral and Starbucks is this place looking like a talking raccoon trashed it.

[beatupgrass]

[There are so many things wrong with the words you just used.]

I'm not- [A RACCOON?? AN ANIMAL WITH NO ABILITY TO MAKE A PLACE LOOK PRISTINE AFTER HE ROBS IT BLIND?? INTERESTED IN YOUR SEX LIFE???

You'll never know, because apparently that sentence had so many multiple choice answers, he just gives up and runs his paws over his ears like 'oh my goood.']

I'm just preparin' for the worst. Things are gonna get pretty freakin' bad on that island and I gotta be prepared to watch my own back.

[Because aside from Drax, he's pretty sure he's not registering as precious cargo to anyone else. Not that he blames them for that any, but thrilling heroics for the sake of being a good guy don't keep you alive. Not that... that's guaranteed anyway. GDI why did he ever decide to develop scruples. They're itchy.]

[pathology]

No shit, that's why I was stocking my medkit. You want one? I'll get it for you if you help me find my condom basket.

[beatupgrass]

[a beat.]

Your what basket?

[No, he totally heard her. He just needs her to say it again.]

[pathology]

[ZERO SHAME OK] My condom basket. It's this big [she gestures with her hands], full of condoms? I'm gonna take it to the front desk. Since, you know, night before war, everyone's fucking like rabbits, right? There's already one baby around here, which as far as I'm concerned is one baby too many. [babies r gross.] Not to mention STDs.

[beatupgrass]

ykw i'm leaving the gif there

[beatupgrass]

They actually let these people breed?

[Yeah.

That's all he's got. But seriously, celestial jesus take the fucking wheel, that is a terrible idea. But fine. He will help you find your damn condom basket for the sake of population control and also maybe shutting you up.

With his search of 29.

So I guess he finds it. Unless it's in Siberia or something.]

[pathology]

I think she actually came to the Knights like nine months pregnant [she was at the wedding!!] but ... hey, I agree with you, buddy. Do you know what shoving a baby out does to a vagina? Do you?

[he's lucky he'll never get to know (at least ... for today) because he found the condom basket. it was in fact just in a cabinet or something i guess.] Oh yay!! You're the best. [SHE WILL TAKE THAT THANKS.]

[beatupgrass]

[NO, HE DOES NOT SPEND HIS LIFE THINKING ABOUT HUMANS AND THEIR REPRODUCTIVE HABITS.

But thank god for the condom basket that he shoves at her with a faint look of disgust before she takes it.]

I've had less disturbing conversations than this in prison.

[pathology]

[she's grabbing him a standard medkit — about the size of a large tackle box — when her eyes go wide at the words prison.]

You went to prison?! Why?

[beatupgrass]

[Yes. Good. He can definitely carry that in his pockets.]

People get very tetchy about things like theft, mercenary activity [eyeroll], and arson.

[pathology]

[GET A BACKPACK. also, there are practically anime sparkles in her eyes.] Arson? Ooo, what did you burn down?

[beatupgrass]

[THAT'S WHERE HE KEEPS HIS GUN.]

Nothin' major. [Like he's just s-so offended by his own rap sheet. That no longer exists.] You blow up a few things and... other things catch fire. Shit happens.

[pathology]

We should blow something up before we go to Andres. It'll be fun.

[ ^ your future mentor.]

[beatupgrass]

[Paaause.]

That's the first thing you've said that wasn't stupid.

[pathology]

[sulk] It's not too late to shove the scalpel through your eye.

[beatupgrass]

Do you wanna make threats or do you wanna deal with the bullshit that's goin' down tomorrow by blowing somethin' up?

'Cause I'm sort of in a vaguely controlled demolitions mood.

[So where do they keep the spare parts and shit around here. DON'T WORRY. HE'LL FIND IT. Hahaha. Look at him start moving off.]

[pathology]

Fine, fine. [already over it tbh.] But not right now, because, like I told you. Oral sex with my boyfriend. Then Starbucks. Two of my favorite things. Even more than arson.

[beatupgrass]

Yeah, still more information than I wanted to know. [waving her off.] Do you think bombs just appear? I need a minute.

[Well, magic exists, but no really. He has to make a bomb first. A good bomb. And maybe another weaponized hadron collider. I mean what.]

[pathology]

There's probably stuff you could use in the armory ... or the hoard wing. Are you even a knight?

[beatupgrass]

[....]

...Yes?

[(bluff 13???)]

[ex_psionic439]

[And in strolls Adam, who glances at Rocket like sup before double-taking.]

Holy shit, it's Bandit the raccoon!

[Yeah he named your fuzzy ass back when Stiles alerted him of your existence.

And out comes the phone to snap chat this shit.]