knightsoflegend | open ♔ valentine's day

Felicity will be firm in insisting that this is not wallowing on Valentine's Day. This is simply wallowing in the guilt that is having to lie to everyone even when telling them the truth would be a simple thing to do -- just not the most explainable.

"I am," she replies, almost defensively. Can't you see all the fun she's having?

At that outburst his hands go up even more defensively, because far be it from him to question her clearly kickass evening. He steps towards the empty spot next to her on the couch, before flopping down with a sigh.

"Do you want some company for your fun? Or is this a one woman ride of excitement?" He doesn't mean that sarcastically either, he's just slightly worried, slightly wanting to wallow a bit himself.

"You are welcome to join this party," Felicity offers. She scoots herself over a bit and pats the cushion beside her. "I know the alcohol will only be frozen sugar water to you, but I do have chocolate."

She holds one of the pieces in her palm to him. "They offer platitudes and compliments in the wrapper."

"I am always for complimentary chocolate." He reaches over to take one from her before holding up a finger. "And, actually, I discovered that the Veil undid whatever the speed force did to my metabolism. I can officially get drunk again."

Which he isn't sure if it's a relief or a concern, but it at least makes him feel normal again. At least there's that.

"Oh! That's..." Felicity's brow furrows, "That's interesting. It did that, but it didn't alter your metabolism? How very selective of the Veil. But -- that does mean you can enjoy one of these!"

She hands him one of the frozen pouches. It's the last one she has, and remarkably it's still pretty frozen. Then she waits, "You don't have to take it."

Barry pauses for a moment as he considers his options here. He could take that bag from her and save her from the hangover that is sure to happen tomorrow, or he could just let her have it because she seems to need it more than he does.

"Nah, it's fine. I tend to do stupid things when I'm drunk anyway."

"Stupid things or awesome things?" She's just teasing, because she's a little tipsy herself.

"Why aren't you doing something tonight?" She thought for sure, Barry Allen - amazing nice and attractive guy - would have something up his sleeve.

" ... Stupidly awesome things? Karaoke was involved." Which can fall into either category, depending on who's doing the singing and how drunk Barry actually is. But this particular stupid thing kind of falls into question two because why isn't he doing anything tonight?

Because the girl he wants to make out with his kinda his mentor.

He just shifts uncomfortably for a moment, trying to blow off the question without really answering it (bluff 11). "Why would I be doing something tonight?"

Unfortunately, Felicity is tipsy and she did not pick up on that at all (sense motive 4). "Because, you're attractive and fun to be around and -- apparently you do Karaoke? We need to go. Not right now. But sometime."

"Yes. We should do that." Karaoke, he means. With Felicity it would be fun and he is slowly getting over his awkwardness about it. But he gives a small shrug in return. "I dunno, I'm not really in a good place for it right now. And the one person I was sort of interested in, is ... sort of off limits." At least for right now. When he gets promoted, maybe they can revisit it, but who knows when that will be?

"Off limits?" Felicity raises an eyebrow as she unwraps a chocolate and spends way too long trying to read the saying. But, eventually she gets it and looks at Barry. "Why off limits?"

His brow furrows for a moment as he goes to pick at his own heart, and he shrugs. "There's probably a whole laundry list of reasons." There's a beat as he considers, but eventually it comes down to the fact that he needs to talk to someone and Felicity is here and willing to listen. "Starting with the fact that she's my mentor and ending with the fact that Oliver will probably kill me."

"Why would Oliv-" then she gets it. "Oh."

She takes a moment to try and figure out what to say first.

"So, first off - Oliver won't kill you. He can't catch you. Second off - he's not here. He's... really not here. I don't even know where he is. He's just... I mean, I'm sure he's on some island or some barge or -- I don't think he's dead. He's really stubborn in that department. He's just --"

Felicity sobers for a moment, "He's gone."

His face softens as he lets her get through that ramble, because he knows how Felicity feels about Oliver. He also knows how Oliver is about feelings and how committed he is to not having any. He shifts when she reaches the end, lifting one arm to wrap it around her shoulders and pull her closer.

"He'll come back. He usually does." There's a beat. "He just needs to work out whatever's going on in his head."

He knows that's not going to make it better, and that Felicity isn't the only one hurting because of this. Thea is upset that he's left, again, and Barry can't really blame her there. But hope comes more naturally to him than anything else and it seems like Felicity needs hope now.

She wants to agree with him, to say that she knows that, but it's really difficult when she doesn't even know where he went to. She can't send a message to him or hack into a satellite to check on him. He's just gone.

"If I at least knew where he was, it would make it easier to figure out what to tell Thea."

"Yeah, and I get that," he sighs, because he knows that Thea is pretty pissed. "But I also think that unless it's an explanation that comes with an apology from Oliver himself, there's not much that's going to make Thea feel better right now in the Oliver department." Not that he blames her for being pissed, because Oliver couldn't seem to say put, but he's going to put that out there anyway.

"And honestly, he left you too. You're not responsible for making things up to her - but if you wanted to try, you could probably commiserate with her."

Felicity nods and leans against Barry. "I just wish he had told her things before he did his vanishing act, because it's really hard for me to tell her that he's out there and her actually trust that he can take care of himself."

Because, Oliver had this issue with telling Thea the truth, even when they both ended up recruited to the Knights.

There's a long pause for a moment, before his eyes roll up towards the ceiling and he cringes a little. "Yeah ... I might have spilled some of those beans, which just kind of ... added to the cauldron of rage she's brewing right now."

Sorry, Felicity. He forgets Oliver doesn't tell people things.

Well, so much for her comfortable leaning. Felicity sits straight up and looks at him. "How many of the beans, Barry?"

Yeah, Barry's about to get himself in trouble. There's a moment of pathetic gaping as he tries to figure out what will get him yelled at less until he finally just spits out. "I forgot that Oliver doesn't tell people things, and I thought that after being here for so long he would have told his sister."

He spilled all the beans, Felicity. He spilled every bean.

Oh, no. No, no, no. This is -- this is so not good. It's not good, because she lied too. She kept things from her. She could have -- Felicity stops and closes her eyes, trying to keep herself from throwing up, because the sudden onset of stress plus the alcohol is not exactly the best combination. Her hand goes up to her mouth, but she manages to stave that off (will save 17) for the moment.

"She's going to be so upset and -- and he's not here to give her whatever insane reasoning he had. He's not here Barry and --" She pauses, looks right at him, "No, you were right. He's going to kill you."

Yeah, that's what he figured she would say. He sighs heavily before shaking his head. "I told her months ago though. So she already is upset, and she's working through it." Slowly. He tries not to bring up Oliver when he can help it and just focus on their friendship, but sometimes he backs himself into a corner again.

"Look, I know that I screwed up and I'm going to have to tell Oliver I'm sorry when he gets back. But waiting for that isn't going to help Thea now."

"Months ago?" She barely squeaks the words out. She shifts a little and rests her elbows to her knees, fingertips pressing her temple as she tries to support her head through this minor panic attack. She breathes deeply and slowly trying to just think this through.

"Months ago," she repeats, but in a much calmer voice. She can only guess that Thea hasn't approached her about this because she's angry or because she doesn't want to have anything to do with her at all. It could make sense. She wishes Oliver was here to just confront his stubborn, idiotic behavior.

Why did Oliver have to be so damn protective? Thea had been on her own in this world for years before they even reconnected, he had to realize that she could handle herself and therefor the truth.

"Sorry. I'm just - I don't even know what to do." Felicity sits up and glances to Barry, "He wanted to protect her, because so many things -- awful things happened to people we cared about because of what he did." Not that it ever stopped Oliver. "I'm sure he wanted to tell her... he just. The longer he waited, the bigger the lie got and I don't think he wanted to disappoint her again."

"And I get that. Trust me, I get that." He doesn't remember Iris, exactly, but he remembers the sting of when she finally found out and the anger and disappointment of finding out that her best friend has been lying to her. "But I honestly don't think this is something you can fix, and more to the point I don't think she wants you to. She wants Oliver to."

Which is the important distinction.

"All you have to do is be her friend. If you want to be her friend."

"I do, it's just - how can she even think about trusting me when she knows all I've done is keep Oliver's secret for him?" This is an absolute worry that Felicity has, because she feels like friendship and trust are kind of things that go hand in hand.

open ♔ valentine's day

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