ORIENTATION ♔ to shake fists at the sky

[shootfirst]

♬ Reasons Why - Nickel Creek

WHO || Kat, Violet, open if people want to bang into them, just threadjack wherever.
WHAT || Kat meets with her new squire
WHERE || Knight's HQ, Upstairs Parlor
WHEN || Thursday evening, March 7th
HOW || Actionspam

[ Vi actually gets a text message from her Knight inviting her to come 'chillax upstairs' in one of the comfortable rec rooms near the Dragon's Hide wing. When she makes her way up there, a blonde in combat boots is slumped in a couch, playing X-Box and swearing up a storm into her headset. A small black cat is curled up apparently sleeping on a pillow beside her. ]

Yeah, well why don't you hop a flight and come say that to my foot in your ass? GO DIE IN A CAR CRASH.

Comments

[graveflowers]

I can dig it, but I'm a Sega girl. Me and Sonic are tight.

I don't think I have any que-- Oh! Is there like a guide, to which knights are bitches so I can avoid them? And is there a celibacy clause, 'cause I didn't notice anything about that and I only wondered afterwards if I accidentally signed up to be a Vestal Virgin, because. [Shrug.] You know, not really something that comes up with Wynn, I don't think.

Also, I know he's all, "oh I don't want a title and I have my deep personal reasons, also that's what my wing men are for" and that's cool, I appreciate his lack of sir-liness, but is there something special we call him or just Wynn, which seems kind of intimate and back to the Vestal Virgin bit, not something that really jives with the whole big man in charge deal.

[ :) ]

[shootfirst]

Whoa cheetah. One at a time. [ she grabs a pillow and smashes it down on her lap under her elbows, ticking off on her fingers ] We've got a pretty low bitch quotient, actually. But there's always Dumage, if you really want one to hate on.

And the only Knights who are sworn to keep it in their pants are the Dragon's Claws. They're not supposed to form deep lasting personal connections with us lowly mortal peons, because it gets in the way of their work ethic or untouchability aura or something.

And everyone just calls him 'sir', if you mean to his face.

[graveflowers]

Sorry, I don't actually think before words come out of my mouth. It's like an illness, called rude.

Okay, another question, possibly six, but I'll try to keep it one. Do I have to take classes or tests or something? 'cause telling you right now, I'm viciously dyslexic and I will fail any kind of written test. [She looks down at her hands a moment, admitting you have trouble with reading is hard enough as a child, as a grown adult who is old enough to have graduated college? It is doubly so.] So, if you wanna toss me off on someone else so my abysmal reading comprehension doesn't make you look bad, that's chill with me.

[shootfirst]

If it makes you feel better, I dropped out of high school for awhile. We're not big on written exams.

[graveflowers]

Sweet. I think I'm good then. I've done the whole knight thing already, so I already know the gist of it, I think.

[shootfirst]

What were you a Knight of? ... And don't say Columbus.

[graveflowers]

Rome. I mean, technically I wasn't a knight, Rome doesn't have knights, but I figure the Legion is sort of similar to the whole shebang. Squires equal the kiddos on probatio, run o'the mill knights are legionnaires, higher ups are centurions and the division heads are senators, the Dragon's Claws are the Praetors and, I dunno, I guess Wynn would be Caesar. Or maybe the personification of Rome itself.

[shootfirst]

You're talking ancient Rome, with the togas and naked Olympics?

[graveflowers]

Well, no. I mean, yeah the concept's been around since then, and we still use the same crappy armor. Literally I think mine was from BC. But I grew up with Hanson, so not exactly ancient.

Also, negative on the naked because gross.

[shootfirst]

I guess I didn't realize they still had that kind of thing.

[graveflowers]

I think it's sort of... secret? Or tactically under the radar. I can't remember.

[shootfirst]

Suppose all this'll feel kind of familiar then.

[graveflowers]

Yeeeeah. Sort of like unending deja vu. Not that I mind, I mean, I joined the Legion, this seemed like the logical step and then there was the whole Salami monster thing which sort of cemented the idea and it's not like I had anything on my agenda, you know?

[shootfirst]

You had to fight animated lunch meats?

[graveflowers]

Well, no, I just can't seem to be able to call it it's proper name without having to, like, forcibly think about it.

Slaadi, thingy, not necessarily a monster, I guess. Probably not to themselves at least.

[shootfirst]

Never heard of 'em. But knowing the name of every Shadow creature to walk the face of the earth is more my friend Gar's forte.

[graveflowers]

Pretty much the Kool Aid guy and just as rude. We are not friends, they are needy, clingy bitches.

[shootfirst]

Well, good thing that's over and done with, then.

[graveflowers]

Right? I think there is a quota for that and I've seriously surpassed mine. Any other giant beast monster will do.

[She scrubs her hands over her face for a second, shaking off the yuck feeling.] Gimme Godzilla any day. Or poodles, those things are vicious.

[shootfirst]

Be careful what you wish for. Hideous human experimentation and liquid zombies were a part of my last fight.

[graveflowers]

Eww, seriously? That's... wicked kinda gross. I don't even like regular zombies. That's, that's just... Yeah. Maybe I'll just wish for poodles. Vicious little fuckers, but you know, milk bone that shit up and you're golden.

[shootfirst]

Nobody likes regular zombies.

Ok, I guess... necromancers, but they're a whole level of fucked up unto themselves.

[ a beat ] Why poodles?

[graveflowers]

Cerberus is a poodle.

[Oh sorry, is that the worst explanation ever? Probably.]

[shootfirst]

Cerberus was a hellhound. I thought that was like, its own special breed of dog.

[graveflowers]

Nope, he's a poodle. I mean, three headed poodle, yeah, so that might be a different breed, but he's still a poodle. Really bitchy poodle, like the one in Oliver.